Tuesday, 11 June 2013
much like the NZ one-day team up the middle of any tournament...
she's still alive, but only by net run rate.
What we thought was the long-awaited day finally arrived, when I got a text at 8:30am - "off to theatre now!". They had decided last week that the stoma wasn't going to cut it, and after the false start that was all of yesterday, it was her turn.
I've clearly not been trained as a Surgeon. First of all, the milk of human kindness has yet to be beaten from my weary soul. Secondly, I tend not to rush to IV Augmentin to treat a bit of a fever. Thirdly, I don't have a clue about the complexity of surgery. I was telling make-do-mum-in-law that this would be a quick sub-one hour nip and sew, that she'd be in recovery for a couple of hours and it'd be kippers and scones for afternoon tea. When I got the thumbs-up call from the surgeon to let me know that he was done, it was close to 12:30, which suggests an op time of 3 hours +. He then went on to tell me how tricky the procedure had been, but that they'd always known that this would be a hard operation. Furthermore, given how much stress the tissue around the stoma had been subjected to, they were worried about infection so they haven't actually sewn her up just yet - they'll leave it open but dressed, and assess in a few days and hopefully finally patch her up then. I'd be perfectly happy to do it myself at home under local anaesthetic - yet another blurring of the boundaries she tells me they used my IV line to induce her anaesthetic).
But despite all of that, at the very least the stoma is gone. I'd lost count of the number of times it had leaked, and even if she knew she'd never tell me. Apparently the skin surrounding it is quite unhappy, and that must be one reason to leave things alone for a bit.
I'm sure her dynamic power zap sports energy drink is simply Raro in a silver package.
Trust the NZ team to take a run-chase that should have lasted 25 overs and turn it into the director's cut of "the Great Escape".
Tonight was much fun. Oldest one chose not to brush her teeth. I "compromised" by making her brush her teeth anyway.
She had her colonoscopy exactly 2 months ago. It was a Tuesday - I'd taken the day off work because she was going to be sedated and therefore more stoned than usual. I'd have preferred to have spent the last two months practicing guitar or teaching the kids how to ride a bike, but there you go.
She sleeps.
#1 Husband
What we thought was the long-awaited day finally arrived, when I got a text at 8:30am - "off to theatre now!". They had decided last week that the stoma wasn't going to cut it, and after the false start that was all of yesterday, it was her turn.
I've clearly not been trained as a Surgeon. First of all, the milk of human kindness has yet to be beaten from my weary soul. Secondly, I tend not to rush to IV Augmentin to treat a bit of a fever. Thirdly, I don't have a clue about the complexity of surgery. I was telling make-do-mum-in-law that this would be a quick sub-one hour nip and sew, that she'd be in recovery for a couple of hours and it'd be kippers and scones for afternoon tea. When I got the thumbs-up call from the surgeon to let me know that he was done, it was close to 12:30, which suggests an op time of 3 hours +. He then went on to tell me how tricky the procedure had been, but that they'd always known that this would be a hard operation. Furthermore, given how much stress the tissue around the stoma had been subjected to, they were worried about infection so they haven't actually sewn her up just yet - they'll leave it open but dressed, and assess in a few days and hopefully finally patch her up then. I'd be perfectly happy to do it myself at home under local anaesthetic - yet another blurring of the boundaries she tells me they used my IV line to induce her anaesthetic).
But despite all of that, at the very least the stoma is gone. I'd lost count of the number of times it had leaked, and even if she knew she'd never tell me. Apparently the skin surrounding it is quite unhappy, and that must be one reason to leave things alone for a bit.
I'm sure her dynamic power zap sports energy drink is simply Raro in a silver package.
Trust the NZ team to take a run-chase that should have lasted 25 overs and turn it into the director's cut of "the Great Escape".
Tonight was much fun. Oldest one chose not to brush her teeth. I "compromised" by making her brush her teeth anyway.
She had her colonoscopy exactly 2 months ago. It was a Tuesday - I'd taken the day off work because she was going to be sedated and therefore more stoned than usual. I'd have preferred to have spent the last two months practicing guitar or teaching the kids how to ride a bike, but there you go.
She sleeps.
#1 Husband
Monday, 10 June 2013
Waiting, waiting
I feel a little bit like a fraud staying here in the hospital at the moment. I feel well enough to be at home, it is just that the stoma is so problematic. Even the stoma nurse has not been able to control the leaking - the stoma is shrinking as it heals and is too small. One of the nurses has hit on a solution to the leaking - excessively bandaging the area and using heaps of water proof tape. It lasted very well for twelve hours, but unfortunately it is at a cost - my skin is starting to breakdown. All of this will be fine as soon as I can have the reversal surgery- hopefully tomorrow.
A big post-surgery change is diet and fluid related. Food wise, I have to eat low-protein, high salt food. This is a little trickier than you might think. White bread, mashed potato and cheesy salty crackers are my new friends. I also need to take electrolyte replacement - the equivalent of two or three sports drinks a day (sports drinks don't actually have that much salt in them, they aren't as good as the advertising has you believe). My Mum found some good stuff at the supermarket. I do need to drink round the clock though. I no longer feel thirst - I go from fine to genuinely dehydrated in a snap. It can be hard to talk because my mouth is so dry. Because I don't feel like eating much at the moment/ can't take that great a volume getting all the fluid down is challenging. Bleurgh. I think that the water/ salt requirements will remain, but over time I should be able to introduce more foods.
Being nil by mouth today was therefore not fun. I don't care about the food but not being able to drink is quite hard for me at the moment. I asked for some IV fluids but my veins have become rather sick of IVs and the hand quite literally spat out the cannula. I got an awesome swollen lump of fluid on my hand as it went. The house surgeons continue having difficulty cannulating my arm. They have asked me to get the anaesthetists during surgery to add an extra line just in case!
I was told that I could eat around 3.30 which turned out to be a mistake. At 7.30pm the nurse came and told me that the surgeon had just finished his elective list and couldn't fit me in. I wonder how impressed he would have been to call me to theatre to learn that I was eating?
Anyway, fingers crossed surgery tomorrow. While I'm waiting I'm watching heaps of episodes of Homeland. It just got very good!
Thank you all again for your emails, visits, Facebook messages, practical help and good wishes. They all help to keep our family functioning at the moment.
A big post-surgery change is diet and fluid related. Food wise, I have to eat low-protein, high salt food. This is a little trickier than you might think. White bread, mashed potato and cheesy salty crackers are my new friends. I also need to take electrolyte replacement - the equivalent of two or three sports drinks a day (sports drinks don't actually have that much salt in them, they aren't as good as the advertising has you believe). My Mum found some good stuff at the supermarket. I do need to drink round the clock though. I no longer feel thirst - I go from fine to genuinely dehydrated in a snap. It can be hard to talk because my mouth is so dry. Because I don't feel like eating much at the moment/ can't take that great a volume getting all the fluid down is challenging. Bleurgh. I think that the water/ salt requirements will remain, but over time I should be able to introduce more foods.
Being nil by mouth today was therefore not fun. I don't care about the food but not being able to drink is quite hard for me at the moment. I asked for some IV fluids but my veins have become rather sick of IVs and the hand quite literally spat out the cannula. I got an awesome swollen lump of fluid on my hand as it went. The house surgeons continue having difficulty cannulating my arm. They have asked me to get the anaesthetists during surgery to add an extra line just in case!
I was told that I could eat around 3.30 which turned out to be a mistake. At 7.30pm the nurse came and told me that the surgeon had just finished his elective list and couldn't fit me in. I wonder how impressed he would have been to call me to theatre to learn that I was eating?
Anyway, fingers crossed surgery tomorrow. While I'm waiting I'm watching heaps of episodes of Homeland. It just got very good!
Thank you all again for your emails, visits, Facebook messages, practical help and good wishes. They all help to keep our family functioning at the moment.
Saturday, 8 June 2013
Leave recalled
I tried to go on leave but it didn't work out. First, I had to promise to come back each day for anti-clot injections. Next, I had to come back for a stoma bag change.
Yesterday morning I realised that the stoma bag was leaking. Down to the hospital. Back home for lunch and a three hour nap. Down to the hospital for clexane injection. Back home and I realise the bag is leaking. Back again. Bag change. Home again. Finally, at 11pm I realise the bag is leaking and there is a lot of blood. Back again.
I've also had some wound seepage so have felt quite disheartened at the mess my stomach is.
The stoma was always a horridly awkward thing and the surgeons are very determined to do the reversal surgery tomorrow.
In the meantime I have a private room with shower and toilet so feel quite swanky! I'm very much looking forward to this being over.
Thursday, 6 June 2013
Going home!
Got the wrong date - Colorectal cancer meeting is next week so my results will be discussed then. All results, both positive and negative go through the meeting.
I had my fluroscopy and everything is well healed. I've been granted leave from the ward so can go home this afternoon, returning Monday or Tuesday. Yay!
An actual update
After the last post I've had a few enquiries as to #1 husband's mental health. He is fine! His creative juices seem to really flow in the blog format.
Beautiful flowers from West Australia family. The arrangement has been much remarked on due to the smell and mix of luxury flowers. Yesterday I took it over to my sick neighbour so she could have a close inspection and a smell of beautiful air.
I have the best visitors. Even if I did have to take morphine after this exuberant visit.
The night blogger. He comes when I'm nearly asleep and taps away, chuckling to himself.
#1 Husband putting a line in my arm. All my veins gave up and despite a number of tries, no one could put one in. #1 Husband is actually super good at doing lines so made a house call. Given the alternative was a PIC line inserted by anaesthetists I'm glad he did it! He is held in awe by the house surgeons and students in the surgical team.
I have a procedure today to see if everything joined well on the inside. If it is OK then I'll have surgery to reconnect everything on Monday or Tuesday and should get weekend leave! Home!
If not joined well on the inside then I'm not sure what will happen. The stoma made is really tricky - not one that I could actually manage to change myself. I guess I'll know more later.
Today is Friday and so oncology MDM day. We should learn after today what the story was with my lymph nodes.
I'm the tap.
I'm not a real tap, of course. That would be inSANE.
Rather, I am the personification of that perfect tap that he has been seeking for these last few days and weeks.
I am like a filling.
I am an amalgam:
I am traditional and I am modern. I am a mixer. I am either mains or mixed pressure, but not both. I'm more square than those found on most bathroom vanities, but not so square that you could caress me with your cheek in the hope of the perfect morning shave. But if you want to caress me, I wont' say no.
No, no, no....
Turn me left and I am hot, turn me right and I am cold. Turn me on and I am yours.
I know there is a basin waiting for me. He knows the basin is waiting for me. I am out there, somewhere - when will he find me?? Will my base be square or round? Of what base metal shall I be made? The best of us all, the most base of us all - they are indistinguishable through the dull lens of time. And that she be our legacy.
Sing my song.
A lost soul shall hide my tears
A founding thought of looming fears
Unreachable, but take me now
Alone and all alone
Hey time
Hey days
Hey undefined displays
Refined away,
Away.
I am the tap.
Rather, I am the personification of that perfect tap that he has been seeking for these last few days and weeks.
I am like a filling.
I am an amalgam:
I am traditional and I am modern. I am a mixer. I am either mains or mixed pressure, but not both. I'm more square than those found on most bathroom vanities, but not so square that you could caress me with your cheek in the hope of the perfect morning shave. But if you want to caress me, I wont' say no.
No, no, no....
Turn me left and I am hot, turn me right and I am cold. Turn me on and I am yours.
I know there is a basin waiting for me. He knows the basin is waiting for me. I am out there, somewhere - when will he find me?? Will my base be square or round? Of what base metal shall I be made? The best of us all, the most base of us all - they are indistinguishable through the dull lens of time. And that she be our legacy.
Sing my song.
A lost soul shall hide my tears
A founding thought of looming fears
Unreachable, but take me now
Alone and all alone
Hey time
Hey days
Hey undefined displays
Refined away,
Away.
I am the tap.
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